Going Ten Yards – Week 1

By Jeremy Schloss
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1. Just had to say it’s good to have the NFL back. I never really thought they would cancel the season, but just the idea of it makes me quiver. What would I do on Sunday and Monday nights? Work out? Read? Do something productive? Sorry, sitting on my couch in my Cowboys jersey, watching games all day, and eating chicken wings sounds way better. No idea what the long term effects of the strike are, but I hope they figured it out and this new system they agreed on works. Don’t want to go through another one of these when the next CBA expires.
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2. Cam Newton = wow. Not sure who saw that coming. Still not sure if Cam is that good or the Cardinal defense is that bad. Next week should help answer those questions with a match against Green Bay. I’d say its a safe bet that he is one of the top players picked off the waiver wire in your fantasy league this week. ____________________________________________________________________________________________

3. Speaking of fantasy, thanks Rashard Mendenhall, Arian Foster, and LeGarrette Blount. You’ve all already made me regret playing fantasy this year. Also, the Nate Keading injury should be proof yet again not to waste a pick on a kicker till at least the last round. ____________________________________________________________________________________________

4. Steeler’s Defense was awful and Bills offense was fantastic. 2011 season is off to a weird start. Trend or anomaly? Very hard to tell in week 1 of the NFL. My guess is they both regress back to their norms.
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5. I really hope that Lion offense stays healthy this year. Man they’re explosive and exciting to watch. I felt like they were that sexy preseason hype team that always performs lower than expectations. After watching them play, I think if they stay healthy this team could be the exception to that trend. My apologies to Andre Johnson and Roddy White, but Megatron is the best WR in the NFL right now. Unless Optimus Prime suddenly picks up how to play corner back, no one is stopping Calvin this season, no one. ____________________________________________________________________________________________

6. Someone let me know where to send flowers to the parents of the Kerry Collins era, because I think it just died in Houston on Sunday. This could get ugly quick for Colts fans, the longer Manning stays out. Frankly, not sure if Peyton missing the season if he isn’t healthy enough is the worst thing. Your team gets a top draft pick and a healthy HOF QB next season. Peyton sitting means there is something seriously wrong with him. I would be worried having him play hurt at this point. This season should at least do one thing, prove just how valuable Manning has been the past decade. ____________________________________________________________________________________________

7. Chris Johnson… really??? You held out all of camp to get that ridiculous contract, and you rush for 24 yards on 9 carries? Titans fans better hope this was only because of the hold out and that he just wasn’t in game shape yet. Those large contracts for running backs are always scary. I can just see all the of the Chiefs and SeaHawk fans nodding with agreement while they burn their Larry Johnson and Shawn Alexander jerseys. ____________________________________________________________________________________________

8. Looks like Dallas picked up right where they left off last year. Another season opener they completely blow and another set of 4th quarter Tony Romo turn-overs. Losing to the Jets in NY (or should I say Jersey, still bothers me they or the Giants don’t play in their own state) is nothing to be ashamed of, but up 14 in the 4th quarter and losing erases that sentiment. Maybe the Cowboys should implore a closer a la Mariano Rivera. Have Romo play 3 and half quarters and bring in a back up QB specialist to manage the last few drives… As a Cowboys fan, this idea both depresses and intrigues me. ____________________________________________________________________________________________

9. My condolences to everyone who had Cleveland in their suicide pools this week. I did one for the first time this season, and losing in the first week would have depressed the hell out of me. Its basically giving your money away. I got cute and took Arizona at home figuring the lousy Panthers and their rookie QB would be a (drew) breeze to take care of. Cam made sure to keep me cursing at my iPhone sports app. for about 3 hours right up until the last play of the game. I’ll be making my Suicide pool pick of the week every week in this article. Next week I’d suggest going w/ the Saints at home against the Bears. New Orleans hung in pretty well with the Pack on the road this weekend and looked every bit of good as we thought they were. I wouldn’t look too much into the Bears upset win against the Falcons. Week 1 always has some funky outcomes. Drew Brees and company should be able to dispel a team that vastly over achieved last season. ____________________________________________________________________________________________

10. Note to Donovan McNabb, those flowers I sent to the family of Kerry Collin’s career… I have a second batch with your name on it. 2 yards passing in the 2nd half? 39 for the game??!? It’s week 1 and your on a new team so I will hold off sending the flowers for at least a few more weeks, but you have been put on notice, they are ready to be shipped. The only one in Minnesota currently enjoying the McNabb era so far is Christian Ponder. I feel for you Minnesota fans. At least you just gave $100 million dollars to your running back. We all know how those contracts turn out. (See #7)____________________________________________________________________________________________

Random thought: Is the Middle East part of Europe, Asia or Africa? I feel like if you ask a group of people, everyone will have an answer but no one will really be sure. Did we all just not pay attention during geography that day back in grade school???